Standing Proud at "About Average"

My friend, Rachel, who has be dating online that I recently wrote about had an update for me. Within the first 24 hours of changing her profile, she received an influx of responses.

I neglected to mention in the previous post that I also had her change her body type from "no answer" to "about average". I told her that "no answer" clearly meant that she wasn't comfortable with her body image and that would be another subconscious (or conscious, depending on the awareness level) thing that men would register and file away about her without necessarily ever meeting her. Perhaps something that would even make them NOT want to meet her...at all.

She argued that you could tell her body type from her pictures. I agreed...and then promptly insisted that she choose one - "what's the harm, when you can clearly see what she looks like anyway?" I told her that since you could tell her body type from her pictures, I would let her select "about average" even though my friend has lovely feminine curves that many men would love (she hates the word “curvy” and thinks it could reel in a guy that wants her to have rolls, not curves).

I've been reading a book called Marry Him (excellent read for the single or involved woman) and it discusses many worthwhile topics. However, one of my favorite underlying themes throughout the book (how I read it) is that feminism has kind of ruined women and their concept of what we "deserve". We all have been taught that we deserve Prince Charming - a Perfect 10, when, in fact, most of us are 4-6's. Women are constantly turning down perfectly good men because they're not Brad Pitt, but many of those men have much more realistic ideas of who they want and will/would have accepted us at our 4-6.

I told Rachel about this concept the same day that we changed her profile and said that we should be happy when we get an 8. She laughed and said, "I'd take a 6 at this point!" This was similar to a response from one of the women in the book that I had already read.

Now I have to wonder though... Rachel got several new responses (prompted by...we may never know what) and was elated about the increased traffic coming in. She was very gracious and thanked me for helping her tweak her profile, saying she didn't know what did it, whether it was changing the body type or the additional paragraphs we added to the page or switching out her main picture per my recommendation, but she was happy about the change in numbers she was seeing. She ended her email update to me with "but they're not anybody I'd want to meet..."

I wonder if we’ll be able to find a way to make Rachel and all women out there like her satisfied. I wonder if she'll be one of those women continuously fishing, playing the game of catch and release to find the bigger, sexier catch. I wonder if she'll ever just be content with being "about average" and getting the same in return. Stay tuned...